Forgiveness

So an area of my life that I don't talk about, and unless you knew me in my late college years or early career...I was previously married. My exhusband cheated on me and wanted out. So even though I meant my promises, I could do nothing. And once his mistress was pregnant...It was over.

So fast forward through many years. I am happily married to PD. We are blessed beyond what I planned for in 5 great kids. God has me on a ride and I will get off when He calls.

And now things have been coming up from the past. About 4 months ago I got a Facebook friend request from my ex's soon to be 3rd wife. Interesting...Why would I want to be a part of that at this point? I just clicked "ignore". Good luck to you both. It's sad!

A few days ago I searched through my group messages on Facebook and I find a note from my ex's mistress turned 2nd wife. We are catching up in a most bizarre way. What really happened on my end, which is all a surprise to her. She was incredibly lied to. We are still PMing and catching up. The constant sin. They had 2 kids together and they are the biggest losers here. And...she apologized.

So, what does a Christian do? I mean, she destroyed a holy union. God hates divorce. There is a stigma with divorce, but we have to not stigmatize everyone. He is obviously a train wreck constantly causing pain. I was misled. She was misled. Two lil girls have their daddy every other weekend, when they should have him constantly. And now another woman!

So, what does a Christian do? I mean, she caused a lot of pain in my life. I made promises to God and man, and she was a part of what caused some of this pain.

So, what does a Christian do? I seriously should hate this woman.

John 8
2 At dawn he appeared again in the temple courts, where all the people gathered around him, and he sat down to teach them. 3 The teachers of the law and the Pharisees brought in a woman caught in adultery. They made her stand before the group 4 and said to Jesus, “Teacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. 5 In the Law Moses commanded us to stone such women. Now what do you say?” 6 They were using this question as a trap, in order to have a basis for accusing him.

But Jesus bent down and started to write on the ground with his finger. 7 When they kept on questioning him, he straightened up and said to them, “Let any one of you who is without sin be the first to throw a stone at her.” 8 Again he stooped down and wrote on the ground.

9 At this, those who heard began to go away one at a time, the older ones first, until only Jesus was left, with the woman still standing there. 10 Jesus straightened up and asked her, “Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?”

11 “No one, sir,” she said.

“Then neither do I condemn you,” Jesus declared. “Go now and leave your life of sin.”




Alright, let it all go. She apologized, and I have accepted. It has been very healing. I have had a lot of evil hatred in my heart for years against this woman and what she did, and I don't think I fully knew I still was angry. But it's gone now. It's all in the past, the way past. She apologized, and recognizes how foolish and niave she was. She wanted to confirm the truth. And oh, I LOVE truth! And she confirms the same thing happened to her. And she warned #3, who chose not to listen. Not much else I can do at this point, but forgive.

Eph 4:32 Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.

Oh, that gets to me! How can I hold a grudge? How can I vilify her in my heart?

1 John 1:9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.

I must do the same. I am a Christian, a follower of Christ, trying to live like Christ did. Even though I am imperfect.

Col 3:13 Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.

Ya know I didn't really know that I held on to some of this. I am so blessed where I am at. But our discussions, and just the mere fact that she wrote me, brings me back to the pain I felt. It has brought some waterworks on for sure.




So we will continue to chat. Maybe become "friends". Who knows? We have some things in common that's for sure.